I Long to be the Best but Fear I am the Worst

  “My name is Bob Livingstone and I have been a psychotherapist in private practice for almost thirty years.  This blog post has been written ​ based on real experiences. The individuals depicted are fictional.” My name is John V and I am forty-seven years old. I have been a school counselor for over thirty...

When Letting Go isn’t the Answer

My father died forty nine years ago this coming November.   He died suddenly of a stroke when I was fifteen years old.  I have vivid memories of that time in my life that immediately triggers feelings of rage.  Some of you may feel that I need to let go of this intense anger because it...

Grief Never Ends: It Evolves

We all experience loss in our lives.  Someone close to us eventually dies.  Is there a way of preparing for the grief that’s to come?  Probably not.  We have been taught that there are clear and structured steps that occur during the grief process.  However this supposed process doesn’t have data to support its validity....

Steps for Healing the Fear-Rage-Abandonment Cycle Part Four

You met Jeff and have followed his powerful emotional journey in Part One, Two and Three in this series.   Hi this is Jeff and I want to share what I have learned about healing the fear-rage-despair-abandonment cycle.   First of all you have to admit to yourself that you have a problem. This is...

Moving Away from Despair-Rage:  Overcoming Abandonment- Part Three

You were introduced to Jeff’s facing his rage in Part One of this series and observed his introduction to feeling abandoned in Part Two.   The issue of abandonment moves forward here.   Hi this is Jeff here and I want to share the continual evolution of my emotional world.   The fear of abandonment lives...

Moving Away from Despair, Rage, Hopelessness and Flashing on those you Love

My name is Jeff and I am thirty-seven years old. I work as a high-school counselor in an economically depressed area.  I have been married to Julia for almost ten years and we have no children yet.   My job can be rewarding during those rare moments when I can actually help students find their...

When is it Time to Put Yourself First Part Two

You met Jerry and Loraine in the first part of this story.  Part one ended with Jerry leaving Loraine in the coffee shop.  He told her that he could not continue a friendship with her while she was drinking and doing drugs.  He felt he could not expend any more energy on his friend who...

When is it Time to Put Yourself First?

Hi, my name is Jerry and I am a thirty eight year old man who is divorced. I have two elementary school children.  I have been friends with Loraine who is thirty-five for about five years.  She is also divorced and has a couple of kids as well.  I actually met her in a group...

Survivor Guilt:  Am I supposed to still be here?

I was running my usual five miles while listening to Bruce Springsteen live. I was trying to figure out why I was feeling despondent and highly agitated.  Just observing how selfish people are pushed me over the edge. A car almost ran me over in the cross walk and there was no apology, just me...