Intrusive thoughts are those thoughts that enter your mind and may cause anxiety and hyperfocus on those thoughts. These thoughts...
Blogs
Recovering from being told I was Stupid
We have finally had lots of sunshine the past few days crunched between days and nights of high winds, rain...
Facing Grief in Covid Times
My father died suddenly almost 56 ago. He was 56 when he died, and he would have been 112 years...
Creating Safety
Every day we see the headlines and read the newsfeed – the latest Corona surge is running amuck; the most...
The Benefits of Long-Term Therapy
There does not seem to be an agreed upon definition of long-term psychotherapy. I have been a psychotherapist in private...
Acceptance: Deciding to Put Traumatizing Memories to Rest
Acceptance is a loaded term in American society. Many suffer from what I call the closing credits syndrome. This happens...
Life Lessons Learned during the Pandemic
I am looking out the living room window. Nobody is on the street and the quiet is daunting. It is...
Promise of Better Days Ahead: Part 10 Seeking Safety
I wake up in the morning religiously at four thirty AM. I have no need to get up that early. ...
How White People Will Benefit from Fighting Racism
It was sometime during 1969 at my house in suburban New Jersey. I was eighteen years old and one...
DV(Domestic Violence) Poem
This poem is dedicated to all the women I have known in my personal and professional life who have been...
Dealing with Shelter in Place, Stay at Home Orders: COVID-19 Crisis
Many states now have issued Shelter in Place, Stay at Home Orders as ways of preventing the spread of the...
Discovering that you are Worthy
Feeling unworthy can adversely affect the quality of your life. Read on to examine this issue. Ask yourself these questions:...
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I’m the Elder Now
When I think about the men and women who were mentors or role models in my life, I feel sad and regretful. My father died when I was fifteen and I am sixty-six now. He and I were going through a difficult period that many teens and their dads go through. My relationship with him was also affected by the brain changes that occurred when he experienced TIAS (small strokes). His behavior and mood became
After Thirty Years of Practice: Why I Still Love Being a Therapist
I started my private therapy practice almost thirty years ago. I was motivated to work for myself because I always had a problem with “authority”. I was not good at following orders I believed went against the best interests of my clients or were not logical. In my thirties, I combined arrogance, a sense of injustice, an intense desire to help others and anxiety into a new art form. I saw my first client in
The Anxiety Interference: What we can do about it
Anxiety can be gripping, debilitating experience. It can be triggered by internal body sensations, external events or anticipation of a situation going off track. Those who suffer from anxiety sometimes feel worried throughout the day. The fear can be experienced as deep background noise or a straight out panic attack. Panic attack symptoms are breathing rapidly and intensely, sweating, heart racing, feeling dizzy or tingling in hands. There are different schools of thought about what
Discovering Peace: Healing Your Internal Family
Do you ever have these thoughts? “I have been in therapy for years, have attended self-help seminars, have taken responsibility for my actions, have taken a close look at my inner demons, but I still feel stuck. I still have problems with personal relationships and trust issues. Why does this nightmare continue?” This phenomenon may be occurring because we haven’t understood the effects of amygdala. What is your amygdala? The amygdala is an almond-shape set
Sandtray Therapy for Ending Unhealthy Relationships
This blog is based on a compilation of several case studies. Thirty-seven-year-old Mary was struggling with ending unhealthy relationships. She realized that she was somehow attracted to men who were emotionally unavailable. They had anger management issues and were verbally abusive. She had been dealing with this relationship trauma for years. Regular talk therapy did help her somewhat, but she felt like she was stuck in an endless loop of bad choices and self-loathing. Mary
Sandtray Therapy is the Coolest Therapy Ever
You may have experienced talk therapy and other modalities, but have never felt they really addressed your problems. Give Sandtray Therapy a try. I have been a psychotherapist in private practice for almost thirty years. Fifteen years ago, I wrote a highly-acclaimed book titled Redemption of the Shattered: A Teenager’s Healing Journey through Sandtray Therapy. Grieving my father’s death took place here. He died when I was fifteen years old. I began to look at
Grief Continues to Evolve even at Social Security Age
My journey of dealing with my father’s death has taken place over five decades. At times, I travel down familiar roads only to end up spinning my grief around where it has no landing place. Other times I will go down those same roads and previously locked doors will fly open and supreme understanding flows into my heart. The problem is not knowing when walking down a path repeatedly indicates that you are stuck inSaving the Damsel/Dude in Distress Syndrome-Solution
Saving the Damsel/Dude in Distress Syndrome symptoms are: The intense desire to rescue someone who may be seriously self-destructive, drug and or alcohol dependent, and/or a victim of perpetrator of domestic violence. You feel this damsel/dude will not be saved without your intervention. You believe no one else either cares enough or is honest enough to get involved in saving him. This intense desire to rescue is experienced as a desperate obsession. You spendTen Signs that it is time to Say Goodbye
Here are signs to determine that it is time to say goodbye to a lover, friend, family member or acquaintance: He has betrayed you by sharing your secrets with others. She is almost always unavailable for support while you always show up for her. He has a substance abuse problem that he never admits to and says you are the one that has the problem because you have the nerve to want to discuss hisRebirth at Age 65: Watching the Trauma Heal
My father died fifty years ago, this month. I am sixty-five years old and I am going through a rebirth experience. Most of my life I have believed that my father didn’t love or approve of me. During the past fifty years, I was locked into a belief system that he despised me. Now because I have experienced proof in photos and written words to refute that belief, I have been feeling his love along
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