Intrusive thoughts are those thoughts that enter your mind and may cause anxiety and hyperfocus on those thoughts. These thoughts...
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Recovering from being told I was Stupid
We have finally had lots of sunshine the past few days crunched between days and nights of high winds, rain...
Facing Grief in Covid Times
My father died suddenly almost 56 ago. He was 56 when he died, and he would have been 112 years...
Creating Safety
Every day we see the headlines and read the newsfeed – the latest Corona surge is running amuck; the most...
The Benefits of Long-Term Therapy
There does not seem to be an agreed upon definition of long-term psychotherapy. I have been a psychotherapist in private...
Acceptance: Deciding to Put Traumatizing Memories to Rest
Acceptance is a loaded term in American society. Many suffer from what I call the closing credits syndrome. This happens...
Life Lessons Learned during the Pandemic
I am looking out the living room window. Nobody is on the street and the quiet is daunting. It is...
Promise of Better Days Ahead: Part 10 Seeking Safety
I wake up in the morning religiously at four thirty AM. I have no need to get up that early. ...
How White People Will Benefit from Fighting Racism
It was sometime during 1969 at my house in suburban New Jersey. I was eighteen years old and one...
DV(Domestic Violence) Poem
This poem is dedicated to all the women I have known in my personal and professional life who have been...
Dealing with Shelter in Place, Stay at Home Orders: COVID-19 Crisis
Many states now have issued Shelter in Place, Stay at Home Orders as ways of preventing the spread of the...
Discovering that you are Worthy
Feeling unworthy can adversely affect the quality of your life. Read on to examine this issue. Ask yourself these questions:...
2012 The Quick Fix does not Work
Americans seem to be in a hurry to find a quick fix to their woes. We seem to seek to escape the rigors of our fast paced, activity laden lifestyles through a variety of means. We consume the latest advertised products, watch the latest reality television programs that tend to focus on human humiliation; we drink to excess, take recreational and prescribed drugs and play video games for hours. This need to exit from theMen are from Earth and so are Women
There has been a lot written about how men and women are fundamentally different (Men are from Mars Women are from Venus as an example). There is not much discussed about how the sexes are similar. While several social movements in America have created more equality between the sexes, societal expectations of men and women haven’t changed much since the 1950’s. Men are supposed to be stoic, emotionless, and not show any affect. We areSuccessfully Launching your Teenager
Many teenagers have difficulty leaving home once they graduate high school. When you reached the magic age of eighteen, it was expected that you would move out of your parent’s home. You would either go to college, vocational school or get a job. This doesn’t seem to be the normal process today. It is not unusual for teens to live with their parents until their mid twenties. This is because: • It is more expensiveFollow Your Dreams
You have reached an important milestone in your life and you are taking stock of how you feel about your accomplishments. You recently had a birthday and may have celebrated turning age thirty, forty, fifty, or sixty. You are pleased about many of your achievements, but feel that important goals have not been reached. If you recently turned thirty, you feel dropping out of college several years ago prevented you from having the career youDo you ever Recover from Emotional Pain? The Answer is Yes
Many of us who have experienced emotional pain wonder if it is ever really possible to recover from it. You have been to therapy, support groups and read plenty of self-help books, but you feel unresolved about your emotional pain. You wonder if you are dealing with it in the most effective manner and you become angry at yourself for not feeling completely unencumbered from whatever trauma you have experienced. You may have been abusedTen Life Changes to Consider while Pondering your Mortality
When do you begin to ponder your own mortality? Is this a right of passage that happens to everyone eventually? Or do we only face the possibility of our own deaths when some tragic event takes place? The tragedy may be someone close to us dying or being diagnosed with a terminal disease. Does society teach us how to deal with our mortality in a dignified and fearless manner? Some of us find solace inThe Hidden Benefit of Grief: Why It Doesn’t Need to Hurt Forever
I was taught, as most of us were, that facing the death of a loved one is an action that should be avoided at all costs because it would cause too much pain. This hurting could only overwhelm you to the point where you couldn’t function. I learned that this need to deny and avoid our own mourning causes physical and emotional complications that profoundly affect the quality of our lives. I recently discovered theWhat kind of Man do you want to be?
Are you confused as to what kind of man you want to be? Are you unsure if you want to present the image you have of yourself to the outside world? Are you afraid that you don’t present a masculine enough profile? Do you believe that society dictates qualities and behaviors that a man is supposed to maintain? Do you have many of the following qualities: stoicism, emotional expression limited to anger, drive to winWhen Calmness is a Trigger for Fear and how to Change it
Many of us are anxious and looking for ways to become more relaxed. We are asked to meditate, breathe deeply or create a calming visual picture in your mind. We attempt these activities over and over again with no positive results. You may be able to relax when you are really not focusing on doing so. Activities such as reading, watching TV or lying out on a beach may feel calming and rejuvenating. But thisRecovery from Rejection
We all get rejected at different times in our lives. Our lovers unexpectedly break up with us. Friends terminate relationships sometimes without rhyme or reason. The job that seemed a shoe-in was not to be had. The college you banked on accepting you with open arms sends a terse rejection letter. Rejection hurts whether you are prepared for it or not. There is a whole series of emotions you go through when you are snubbed.
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